Remember the feeling when you were about to graduate high school? There was this nervous anticipation for the future but an easy knowledge that life was moving forward the way it was supposed to. College was this vast, unknown, wonderful world that promised everything from an extra fifteen pounds to some of the best memories of your life; you cried and told all your friends you’d keep in touch forever before walking across the stage to start a new chapter. It was scary and weird and different and new, but it was also right, and in that, it was wonderful.
Remember the feeling when you accepted your first job? There was this “holy crap” moment when they told you the salary and the hours, there was an even bigger “holy crap” moment when you thought about living on your own, new roommates, maybe I’ll get a new TV, maybe I’ll get a pet. The real world looms largely over your head through most of your adolescent life and with a single phone call or email, you’re now a part of it, you’re in it. You cried with your family from excitement and promised to stick it out, even if your whole job description involved coffee runs and catering to a crazy boss. It was scary and weird and different and new, but it was also right, and in that, it was wonderful.
Today. Today starts the last weekend in a journey where I was once again a student, and I graduate this weekend with the intent to make this a career. Today starts the beginning of the end of the most incredible six weeks of my life. I’ve laughed and cried and learned more about myself physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually, than I even knew there was to learn. I’ve completely reshaped how I view the world and the people in it; I’ve completely reshaped my entire world and the people I want in it. My practice as a yogi has transformed so deeply that I’m terrified at the thought that I’m somehow qualified to do the same thing for other people, and yet I can’t wait to share every piece of this with anyone who wants to learn. This journey was scary and weird and different and new, but it was also so, so right, and in that, it has been wonderful.
I am not my ego, I am not a yogi, a New Yorker, a girlfriend, a friend or even LB. As I end one journey to begin another, I am only one thing:
I am.