Original draft: May 14, 2015

the other night, horribly bored by the prime time offerings of Time Warner Cable, I decided to play around in HBO on demand and was pleasantly surprised to find The Fault in Our Stars. I love the book, I cry every time I read it, and frankly I cried throughout most of the movie, the kind of ugly tears that happen when you’re on your couch alone after a long day. There’s a point in the movie where lots of things are happening, and Augustus Waters tells Hazel Grace “I love you so much.” [needs more context]

I’ve heard those words before, from all manner of different people. “Love ya much” to end a conversation with my anchor G and my soul sister E, and I’ve heard it from family, and even in a way from little miss, as she waits for me by the door every day when I come home and how she has to sleep on my pillow with me every night. But there’s that awful moment sometimes where you see something happen and it just breaks you a little bit. Because I’ve never heard those words from the one kind of person that you want to hear them from, so much.