When your relationship of nearly four years falls apart, a lot runs through your head. “What could I have done differently?” and “What am I going to do now?” are two big ones, but “Who am I going to hang out with?” is the scary one, especially if you were someone like me, who wrapped up so much of her life in her significant other. It’s scary for a little while, to be on your own for the first time as an adult, but maybe if you’ve got half my good luck, you’ll have a friend who was a part of your life step in, almost out of nowhere, and suddenly your whole life changes.

When your single partner-in-crime of just four months tells you “I met a guy!” a lot runs through your head. “”Is she going to leave me?” and “What if he doesn’t like me?” are two things that come to mind, but “What if I lose my best friend?” is the scary one, especially if you were someone like me, who had never been single in her 20s and was expecting a lot more time with her showing me the ropes of the bad bar scene in NYC. It’s scary for a little while, when they start dating and it’s serious, but maybe if you’ve got half my good luck, you’ll realize from day one that this guy is someone different, and he fits in the group like he was meant to find us, and suddenly your whole life changes.

When you wake up the morning before their big day, a lot runs through your head. “I can’t believe it’s already here!” and “Oh god I’m already nervous” are two of the first thoughts that pop in your head, but “I’m so fucking excited for them!” is the big one. Because maybe sometimes when your life changes in ways you’d never imagined in such a short period of time, it’s scary, and all sorts of terrible thoughts run through your head. But then again, if you’ve got even an iota of my good luck, you’ll be staring down a weekend dedicated to two people you love more than anyone celebrating how they love each other above all else.

So here’s to love, bridesmaids dresses that decidedly don’t suck and a weekend with friends in fancy gear watching two people say two words before taking the first steps into forever. My R&H, I’ve learned to expect the unexpected when it comes to you two, and I wish you a life of perfect surprises – most especially, the ones that start out as scary thoughts.